(With apologies to Fiddler's Dram.
An approximately true account of Tyne Bridge's sojourn at Broadstairs Folk Week)
Didn't we have a lovely time
The week we went to Broadstairs
The kit was too hot and we forgot
To take along a crate of plasters.
Two days of sun then thunder begun
And most of us were camping
Having to try to keep our all kit dry
As the rain came down
Don't you recall the first night of all -
We'd not even started dancing -
Pauline's upset tum - with delerium -
She had to be taken away you know
And don't even think of blaming the drink
She hadn't been on the cider
A virus some berk had passed on at work
Had brought her down
We did the parade then somebody made
An arson attempt on the garlands
Janet went to attack, but Sue held her back
Preventing a nasty scene you know.
Then oh what a thump - it made us all jump
When Thug dropped his bouzouki
It came off its strap and fell off his lap
And thundered down
And who can forget the night it was wet
We were having a pizza party
Up at the camp - at first it was damp
And then the heavens simply opened
The team and their kin were soaked to the skin
And the field was just a quagmire -
It takes a big drain for a whole inch of rain
To run on down
Next day the sun shone and now we were on
To do some street collecting
We did some busking but a team from the Ring
Wouldn't dance with us so we moved on.
We busked alone got soaked to the bone
With our own perspiration
'Cos when we're booked to dance there isn't a chance
We'll let you down
Oh wasn't it grand to do the Bandstand
And hang around for ages
Through an act that was twee - and then the MC
Told us curtly that our set was too long
His arrogant pose got up Janet's nose
So she took him aside and spoke sternly
Said "Listen to me - we do this for free"
And he backed down
Then on Saturday we drifted away
And the campsite it got empty
Except for Pam's tent whose zip had got bent
And Pat's caravan which was there 'til teatime
And every day that we were away
We sent a card home to the Bagman
Who made up this song getting everything wrong
And wrote it down
©Brenda M Boyd
MMIV